Our Journey toward Wholeness…

negative emotions 33Full range of Emotions.. We come into the world with a full range of emotions.  The predominant belief in modern psychology is that some of our emotions are hard-wired by nature and some of our are learned through our environment. The emotions that we are hard wired with are  thought to be universal across culture. These specific emotions are evident no matter what the race or ethnicity. These are labeled as basic emotions and they are: anger, disgust, fear, happiness, sadness and surprise. When looking at a brain scan we can even see and differentiate between these basic emotions.

When did we begin to label our basic feelings as positive and negative?  This judgement and labeling is pervasive in our culture, at least in the United States and can even be seen labeled as such by psychologists, self-help authors  etc…I don’t see them this way and I think its a misguided and potentially dangerous belief.  I see them as adaptive. They act as feedback to us about what is going on in our environment and because of this feedback we make choices about how to navigate. At a primal level its our fear that keeps us alive. It stops us from crossing the street to get hit by a car. We also learn about our own personal preferences from the feedback of our feelings. Most importantly our emotions serve as part of our energetic vibration that we are sending out and creating our life with.

A Personal and Cultural Plague… I have come to the conclusion that one of the main problems that we all have and that perpetuates even more problems in our culture, myself wholeheartedly included is this; we don’t want to feel what we have come to think of as *negative emotions*   From a logical standpoint, it makes sense, why, because it feels bad to feel bad. Not a one of us wants to feel bad…ever. So we don’t…we create multiple ways to avoid and distract ourselves when we feel bad. Its gotten to the point where many of us aren’t feeling at all anymore.

Use of Addiction as a Distraction from our Feelings… I heard Panache Desai say that we use “addictions as distractions” . This makes so much sense to me…When we want to avoid ourselves and our *negative* feelings we drink alcohol, do drugs, shop, overeat…fill in the blank …all to avoid feeling these feelings which are often deeply rooted in past traumas that we carry with us. These addictions that I am referring to are very real and have a strong physiological component to them but often these are just the *surface* problems that underlie an unacknowledged deep wound.I see this in my work all the time, persons with horrible chemical addictions that cannot stay sober, they have had multiple treatments and yet they can’t string together a few months of sobriety over their whole adult life. Why is this? The deeper wounds go unaddressed because people tell themselves “that happened along time ago” or “it wasn’t that bad” or “everyone has some abuse” or the trauma may be unconscious but the wound is still there and I am here to tell you that the wound is part of their energetic vibration. These people remain perplexed as to why they can’t draw positive circumstances into their lives…This, this is the reason.

The use of Spirituality and Positivity to mask unaddressed Trauma The use of spirituality and positivity can also be used as a way to avoid our wounds rather than address them. Immediately I think of Abraham and Esther Hicks who I love…The entity of *Abraham* is channeled through Esther Hicks. Abraham comes from a group consciousness from a higher dimension. The channelings are so profound and ring true and have led many many people into creating better lives than they could have ever imagined. I am here to say that I 100% agree with what they are teaching but…yeah there is a but..some people may be using their *focusing* methods as a way to escape  instead of integrating further their higher and lower selves.  This is something I suspect happens a lot in some spiritual circles. We are both human and spiritual which makes life on earth very complicated and difficult..When we use the law of attraction and combine it with Abraham’s teaching we have to be careful that we are not doing so in a way that bypasses our deeper work, which is for a lot of us some past trauma; childhood abuse, sexual assault, serious physical ailment..etc.  Can we get into the vortex(our ultimate positive reality) and manifest with deeper wounds, absolutely but the wounds and the painful feelings remain in us and they are still part of our vibration if we don’t process through them and allow our negative/painful wounds to surface and  we are abandoning parts of ourselves, which doesn’t lead to wholeness…and I agree with what Jane Fonda said in Oprah’s Master Class: “We are here to become whole.” It is the integration of being both human and spiritual being  thats tricky..


Many people can stay in lower levels of consciousness focusing on negativity and never allowing higher states and thus more love in and many others  can sit on top of a hill and meditate for twenty years and avoid all contact with humanity and any lower/negative emotions. I get it… I have been both these extremes at one time in my life but now I have come to a place where I want both…Because both are me… I cant believe that the Source Energy that created us wants us to bypass these *negative* emotion. Why would we be created and hard wired and come into the world with a full range of emotion then?

Shadow Work… There is *shadow* work involved in the integration of our human and spiritual selves. The shadow work is for the bravest among us…but unless we bring our trauma to the surface to be healed, the vibration we are sending out is going to be mixed and never allow in the abundance that we truly deserve. As I said earlier…we can certainly manifest when in allowing in higher states of consciousness but we are abandoning the parts of ourselves that need the most love and thus doing ourselves a big disservice

Its important for me to say that I myself don’t  like facing my shadow side and so I am one of those that would rather shop, eat or drink just to “feel better” so I cant claim I have *arrived* and that my own work is finished…this would not be a truthful portrayal of who I am. More than anything these days I just want to keep it real and yes..integrate.  Namaste

6 thoughts on “Our Journey toward Wholeness…

  1. Renae,
    I agree with everything you share here. You touch on a number of concepts that I think are worth exploring in more depth, although I might approach them differently because I’m still not sure “vibrations” have anything to do with anything. It’s nothing more than the fact that I just don’t know. I do know our voices are vibrations, etc. but whether it goes beyond that and whether or not there’s any reason for putting another “name” to our thoughts, expressions and feelings, I’m not sure.

    But I do understand what you are saying here and that they are important elements in our journey, not to be overlooked:

    1) the trauma may be unconscious but the wound is still there…the wound is part of their energetic vibration
2) we are abandoning the parts of ourselves that need the most love and thus doing ourselves a big disservice

    What you are describing is part of the process I go through in my memoir. Looking at aspects of my life that were defined as “negative,” and not being afraid of them, not glibly dismissing them, but finding the way to love and accept them, which ultimately leads to finding the path to peace.


    Liked by 1 person

    1. CJ thanks for the comment..so appreciated.. By Energetic Vibration I mean that everything including ourselves is energy so our past trauma is also contained in this energy. It pertains to Quantum Physics and its a proven fact that everything in the world is one big energy field and that nothing is really separate. Unfortunately, many are not aware that this is a fact or just remain unaware altogether. For the science behind QP consult: Tiller.Org


  2. I’m aware of the concepts of Quantum Physics, and I still don’t know that I agree that vibrations impact us in any meaningful way. I’ve read quite a bit about it and, at this point, I’m going to retain my perspectives on it.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ok.You got it CJ…I am only around those (for the most part) that do agree with it if they know about it…so I have never seen any material or article that says why it wouldnt be true..so its good to have differing view so we can expand!!


  4. Interesting blog Renae. I have personally thought that the focus on constant positivity creates a danger of turning us all into fake cardboard cutouts of ourselves, rather than allowing us to be authentically who we are. As humans there will be times when we feel bad. That is the nature of life. If we become constantly afraid of allowing ourselves to feel these natural fluctuations of highs and lows… afraid of drawing what we don’t want to ourselves, we are not being genuine. We are merely living in denial. This cannot be healthy. Of course, allowing ourselves to wallow in misery is not a great solution either. Accepting that we feel miserable and taking steps to do something about the cause is far more positive than plastering a false smile on our faces and chanting to ourselves that all is wonderful.


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